Do you love yourself? Are you comfortable in your own skin? Do you own all of you?
I found this card when I was cleaning up my studio on Saturday. This was created 25 years ago and was the affirmation that I gave to myself back in an Insight 11 The Opening Heart Seminar in 1985. This was the year that I seriously embarked on starting on the journey of self discovery that brings me to where I am today.
I thought this was a good starting point for my Self Love story. Those words: Accepting and loving me have been the ones that are most challenging to truly believe. It took me a long while to learn that love first comes from within and is so empowering when we stop looking outside of ourselves, then we can see only love.
“Love is what comes from within, loves know no boundaries, love opens the doors to freedom and joy. Love conquers our fears. Love opens ones soul to a higher place where sharing love openly allows us to shine. Love ask nothing in return. Love allows me to be at peace.” – Suzie Cheel
The path to self love is a journey, like any journey there are the highs and lows, there many paths, many questions, many answers and I have been down many byways to get to the point I am at now where I am me and I am okay, as Virginia Satir says in her poem Self Esteem. This book of the poem was also the inspiration for my book Emergings: A meditation on the emotions of change which is primarily about loving oneself, accepting oneself, having high self esteem and understanding that life is a wonderful ongoing journey of change and self discovery.
One of the things that I have come to realize is that to get to being able to really say I love me and I am okay requires that I trust ME, my feelings,my intuition, my higher self, those niggling gut feelings that I kick myself later for when I haven’t followed.
When I totally love myself I am truly free. Do I always love myself? No I still beat up Suzie, what is different today is that I am conscious of when I am doing it and why. I also have tools and resources that empower me. I also know what juices me and makes my heart sing. I am in alignment with what I call my empowerment needs.
Another challenge I have had to deal with is looking outside myself for answers and solutions.
- Someone else will provide a solution.
- Someone else will have the answer
- Someone else will do it better than I can
- And the BIG one: I am not good enough!
What I know now is that while I have spent too much time looking outside of myself for both inspiration and guidance, I have played the comparison game. This has delayed the process of totally accepting that I am comfortable in my own skin and accepting that when I love who I am I can then live my purpose and empower others and make a real difference in the world today.
Ways to self-love:
One of the ways to self love is to move out of fear. Fear stops us big time. I know I have allowed fear to hold me back:
- The fear of failure
- The fear of success
- The fear of I am not enough
One of the tools I have used is to keep a love journal and I give this verse to my clients to put in the front of their love journal
Where you are at now is okay
Be with what is
Not what might be
Acknowledge the courage and the strength
that took you to this point.
When the whirlwind churns in your mind
Take out your pen and write in me
I’ll help you through the fear, the pain and anguish.
Your thoughts, your dreams
Your hopes and desires
Will be safe with me
And when you find
The light that shines from within
When love and joy and happiness emerge
I’ll be a comfort for reflection
You’ll find the courage that enabled you
to take that first step
The strength you need to take the next risk.
© Suzie CheelDo you love yourself? Can you say I love me and I am okay?
with love
Be inspired, be empowered, be the change and make a difference TODAY!
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“Enjoyed reading my story of self-love? Well, there’s more! You can also read the rest of the stories written by online personal development bloggers in a Self Love Stories Report. Evelyn Lim started the ball rolling by sharing her story in the post Self Love Story: Lessons from the Heart. She had written it in response to an intuitive call to create greater Self Love Awareness. The report, compiled with the help of Lance Ekum, will be available as a free download soon!”
I love this post, its very inspiring. Without self-love you lack the confidence of knowing that you are able to provide basic needs and desires for yourself. As successful a woman as you may be (as a parent, in your role at work, as a sibling, friend, or mentor), without self-love you continue to struggle with feeling worthy and emotionally independent. You rely on others for evidence of your value and self-worth, and continue to question evidence even when it is presented to you.
Lynne
Hi Lynne,
So true self-love is paramount in becoming a total empowered person- when we keep looking outside ourselves we become disempowered.
Suzie
Suzie,
It’s inspiring to see the beautiful artwork that you created 25 years ago! I love this piece you’ve create for your client’s love journal. I’m also writing on the theme of self love this week. I too have the challenge of looking outside of myself for answers. But as you say so eloquently, though we may still have challenges, we’re all the more conscious of them now and have an array of tools to transform them. Hoorah!
Hi Sandra,
Yes I sometimes wonder whether i will get to just look inside me I feel life is easier when we can be at peace from within. look forward to reading your piece on self-love.
love
Suzie
Suzie,
I love your emphasis on being comfortable in your own skin. That is such a core factor in having a great life!
Hi Columbia,
thanks i like that that touched a cord in you. Yes I think we don’r always realise how import that is:)
I love your poems and sharing about your journey and how you’ve helped yourself in coming into greater self-love. The verse that you give to your clients is beautifully said. I can feel it at the level of the heart.
Thank you once again for participating in my Self-Love Project. I believe that your sharing will touch a cord with readers.
With love and hugs,
Evelyn
Hi Evelyn,
Thanks for asking me to be part of this ans oit was an awakening for me to read back over words i wrote so many years ago and find myself on a similar path 20 years on, amazing
love and hugs
Suzie
Great post Suzie! Today I can say “I Love Me… All of Me!” But, I too, went on a journey to come to back around to this … I say “back around” … as little children love themselves right from the start. They are not critical of themselves… until that have been taught to be… They truly believe that are AOK – until they eventually learn to measure and judge themselves.
It’s funny … we want to be who we are… yet we measure and compare ourselves to others.
I have thrown away the measuring stick…. I do Love Me!
Thanks for a great article and for uplifting others! 🙂
Big Hugs,
Ellie
Wow Ellie,
You made my heart sing and I was so surprised that what I am writing now I was writing about all those years ago. Different path then.
Yes that looking outside ourselves and all the judgement……. I like you alluding to how we be as children until we learn not to be okay
love and hugs
Suzie♡♡
Dear Suzie,
I tell myself I love myself but I think I may be lieing to myself. I am stuck in a relationship that I know is not very good for me but I feel powerless to do anything about it. I am slowly trying to figure myself out and reading article such as yours really help they really make me think and reflect.
Hi Valerie,
Sounds like you need that Love Journal 🙂 When I read that you are trying to figure it out, i know how you feel, what I have found that when we are trying to live from our head- that is figuring it out mode life can be painful- getting to live from our heart and do what feels good will move you towards higher self esteem and in turn self love.
hugs
Suzie